Hem of His Garment

Believing has never been something I have had in my life.
Believing is not a question I want or need to answer.

I want to write down a story that is not mine to tell but I need to write it down.

Yesterday my dad told me of his experience several years ago and I cant get it out of my head. It was when Euan fell down the mountain.

Firstly here are the lyrics that were stuck in dads head after he heard a song played on the radio. The song is by Sam Cooke it is very old. (You tube it)

"Oh, there was a woman in the Bible days,
she had been sick, sick so very long
but she heard about Jesus was passing by,
so she joined the gathering throng
and while she was pushing her way through,
someone ask her: 'What are you trying to do?'

She said:
'if I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'll be made whole'

She cried:
'Oh Lord, Oh Lord and Oh Lord, Oh Lord'
Said :
'if I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'll be made whole'

Oh, She spent her money here and there
until she had no, had no more to spare,
the doctors, they'd done all they could
but their medicine would do no good.
When she touched Him The Saviour didn't see
but still He turned around and cried
'Somebody touched me'

She said:
'It was I who just wanna touch the hem of Your garment,
I know I'll be made whole right now'

She stood there crying:
'Oh Lord, Oh Lord and Oh Lord, Oh Lord'

Said:
'If I could just touch the hem of His garment,
I know I'll made whole right now'"

At the time that dad heard this song on the radio my brother was in the ICU at Nepean Hospital after falling from a cliff. He was in a coma and sustained a massive head injury. He was flown from the accident in a care flight helicopter.

My dad was not a church goer nor a christian.

He told my mum on the same day he heard the song on the radio that he was going to church as he just had to go there. My mum asked if it was the nearest church (St Michael's) and he said no, he was off to the little one in Castle Hill. My mum did not question it she went along.

As they sat in church the priests sermon this day was as the above lyrics. My dad could not believe it.
The song he heard on the radio was the topic of the church service!

He stayed behind afterwards and spoke to the priest. He introduced himself as Colin Dunlop and the priest interrupted him and asked if he was Euan Dunlops father, the young man in hospital. My dad was shocked and said he was. The priest stumbled and spoke of his congregation, whom had concentrated their prayers on this young man "Euan Dunlop" for several weeks since the accident.
The priest gathered the church elders and introduced them all to my parents. They all  new about Euan and were praying for him together.

He hugged my dad and asked if he would come back to church next week and my dad told him probably not.
The priest told dad that dad had been sent to the church to let the congregation know that there prayers had been answered and if he did not come back it did not matter. God had answered their prayers.

My dad told me of this story only yesterday several years after the fact. He told me that this is only one of his experiences and he believes that there has to be something out there.

I am so moved by this story and am praying for Zali

So many of your people are silently supporting your family.


Matt your poems/lyrics touch my heart and I adore you for sharing them.

I am no churchy, but it is what it is

we all love you guys, if you need anything please call.

Jen

The end of October already.

I have no clue of the actual amount of time, but it feels like a long time since I have felt like writing.

Their is a whole lot of warmth in my heart tonight. I am thinking of my loved ones. Those who are precious to me.

With all of the commitments we have at the moment I have shut myself of with family and I am feeling a bit guilty about friends. What I have learnt in the past 12 months is that my friends will understand.

This afternoon I had a big fight with Will, he would not eat dinner again and we got so worked up and he ran away from home (next door). He was tired and I had no idea that his dad had given him a sandwich before he went out. So I need to ask, to smack or not to smack because hubby and I reached a point tonight where we decided it did nothing anyway. In the heat of the moment though I really need to learn more disciplining techniques.

I was smacked as a child and all it did was make me fear my dad and withdraw from him. I would hate my children to feel that way.

How will I cope when both the boys are arguing with me? eek.

My "little sister" is famous this month, a magazine has done an article about her and her close friend. I was teary when I read it. It is all about how she has supported a friend throughout the depths of depression. It goes on the say how she visited her in hospital every chance she could and how special she made her friend feel. Oh I was so proud reading it. Knowing what I have gone through this past 12 months. What a beautiful celebration of true friendship. We sat about in the afternoon sun and she played with my boys. Just an amazing afternoon. Her dad said to me that I had something to do with how she turned out. What an amazing compliment, what a beautiful woman she is.

With such a short time until Christmas it is a strange time. Tom is two at the end of this coming month. I can not believe the time has gone so fast and the amount that I have accomplished.

Today I found my waist and I was very happy to see it so I celebrated with some chocolate (I see a problem here can you?) My husband was also happy to see it and told me so. He is still making me laugh and driving me nuts.

Halloween tomorrow, fun with the boys. I can play with make-up and dress ups yeehaw!

"Bigger Better, Bigger Brighter"

It's OK, it's OK just need to slow down my brain a little.

So where should I start?

Right in front of me is a little man with a throat infection. Laying on the lounge with a pillow and his doona watching playschool. He has thrown up today (all over my bedding) and is looking very much in grey scale. Poor little man!

To my major concern, if he is ill tomorrow how do I start my first day of new job?

You may be asking, new job? well to be Frank...so am I!

It all happened in a whirlwind and I am slowly trying to work it all out.

I am doing a full 4 days next week too!

How in blue blazes am I going to get this done?

I wasn't even on the job hunt and somehow I managed to get one. I figure that fate or whomever slowed me down by making me redundant so I will just go with the flow. Perhaps it is time?

I have said to my hubby that if it is not for me I will not stay.

The saving grace is that I know many people at this place and I am not worried about the actual work at all. What I am worried about is not giving myself enough time to stay better. As it is I currently nap with the boys 3 times a week. To some it may sound lazy but to me it is my way of staying "Bigger Better, Bigger Brighter" (this being my accidental mantra). At first I had the guilt's about my day sleeps but as time has gone on I have become very much reliant on them.

I have anxieties on not having enough energy/time to go to the gym.

If I add to my stack of cards again will they all fall to the wayside again?

Will my Graves disease see the stress levels rising and mess me around again?

Over the next few weeks I have a few fears that I am concerned with so I need a plan. The first course of action is to go to the chemist and get all the meds I will need and make sure I do not run out. So I will do this today when Tom wakes up.

The next thing I will need to plan out with my gym bud is our schedule for the gym. Making sure we stick to the plan and making sure that I have a sitter for the boys.

Then I need to maintain the groceries so that we are eating well. So I will do the groceries today also. Making sure that I get enough meat and fruit and veg for the next week and a half. I also need to take my milk and bread with me to work so I don't start eating normal bread and milk again.

Clothes is next I will need to do all the washing tonight and make sure that my outfits are fitting me and clean and ironed.

Apart from the above mentioned things I am also worried about the boys. So to make things a little easier on me I will ask my mum and dad to help out by doing breakfast and dressing the boys on the days they have them (not a real big deal for them and we can just enjoy the morning rather than stressing). Hubby will do a few pick ups for me too if I ask him nice.

So after writing it down I do still feel a little anxious about the next week but not as much. I have a plan.

I have a sitter for Tuesday and we are going to dinner. Tomorrow my great girlfriend is coming to stay with her son!! EXCITEMENT PLUS. Hubby is away for the night too. I have Friday off to spend with them. It is the long weekend also so these are the fantastic things happening!! Must buy grog and food for them today as well.

Races this weekend? must double check if we are still going...
I am a busy woman but I can do this

( I have booked a massage for Sunday too)

If it all falls to pieces you will no doubt read about it and if you see me be sure to pat me on the back and say "it is OK you are doing a good job" (lie if you have too)

Ciao

It was the worst day in ages yesterday!

So hard to find your groove when it's late to the party!

Windy days and I are not friends.

Something about everything being so stirred up that it leaves my head in a muddle.

Yesterday was SHOCKING! started badly because I felt sick. If we counted how many times the boys said "mummy" I am sure it would be in the millions. I was so close to changing my name!

Tomi was just whinging all day and Will kept wanting to show me everything "mummy, mummy look at this. Its a rock mummy" ARGH. Grocery shopping whilst hungry was a bad idea. We have some amount of snack food!

Hubby was late in so I was alone with them and fell asleep with them at half seven! I thought about calling people over to help me.

I tell you what, I have such respect for single parents!

Today is so much better already. Cleaning out the rooms and next minute Tomi had taken himself to bed and was laying down with his 8 dummies.

When I am not at my best the days can be horrendous so today I took a trip to my neighbours and had a mid morning break. We had a coffee and treat. Both boys are in bed.

Tom said "plane" today and is getting a little more vocal. He has a gnarly face that he puts on when he is told "no". I wonder where he gets the bitch face from??

Boot camp measurements tonight. dreading that result after my bad weekend!

ciao for now

So this morning I was woken by the question "where did your Dickie go mum?" So with a slight grin I had to try and explain to Will that I didn't have one and that I had a different wee wee because I was a girl. He kept at it though he kept asking and I think I may need a little help with this one. Google will be asked today what I could say or perhaps you could help me by leaving a comment on how you would or have handled that one.

The next early morning thing I need help dealing with is recurring dreams. Last night I dreamt of someone I am missing badly and I cant seem to stop the dreams. I would really love to stop them because I want desperately to move on.

The boys and I just went to feed the neighbours cat this morning and delightfully the peacock was out and he had his tail up for us. Such a beautiful sight to wake up to! He is so lovely and so loud. If you get a chance google a peacock and listen to the sounds those things make. He lives on our street and is simply part of the hood.

Currently hubby is making coffee and the boys are playing in the lounge which I have turned into a giant bed. Wills mattress is out and all the doona's and pillows from the whole house. Did you and your sibling's ever do this? The boys are jumping and snuggling and we put a rug rats cartoon movie on for them while we had a lay in.

Yesterday we went to a party and had a fantastic time, this place was like your grannies house but on speed. They had everything you have ever come across for kids at a garage sale inside this huge place. The boys were a little rough and the ball bit soon turned into a mosh/wresting pit.

The lady who ran the show was all over it! The boy who had the party had asked his mum for an "island" cake and I found this hysterical! The mums I knew sat and had a drink and chat and it was so easy and relaxed.Love those days.

When we got home daddy had made the boys guns and last night spent more time on them. Will slept with his and has not put it down this morning.

The weather is looking good so i might need to take a trip to my friends place today. Nice to have Sundays with friends and fam.

So many fantastic things have happened this weekend already and its Sunday morning at 8am.
Love my life, love my boys, love my friends.

Ciao for now coffee is ready.

A balanced family is a happy family

What a fantastic day yesterday was. The best part of it was by far sitting with my Little family having dinner together. We had fish and Will kept on saying "My don't like fish, yuk". We had such a laugh. Daddy was playing songs on the guitar to get the boys to eat dinner and by the time he was done his dinner was cold. They played hide and seek for ages and Will was counting and missing a few numbers here and there. Cute.

To get Tomi to sleep hubby had to play guitar for him. Tomi went into his own bed and got himself all ready. I was in my bed with Will and we read lots of books.

My absolute favourite book is the Dr Seuss book, Oh the places you will go. I had no idea how relevant a child's book could be to my life. Ha ha loved reading it too my little mate.

I had to fill in some paperwork yesterday and I had to tick a box that said I was a housewife. That in itself is funny! I have never thought I would be a housewife and I much prefer stay at home mum. Housewife to me is so 1920's.

We had a really great game of netball last night. Worked up a sweat and had a great time. I have been doing a lot of classes and training. I still have to stop eating the wrong thing. You know when you are doing the work and you are at the stage where you think you should be a super model and your still struggling to do up your jeans? Well I'm at that stage!

Healthy body, Healthy mind.

A bigger better, A bigger Brighter.

It feels like we have changed our routine to include runs and trips to the gym. It seems to be really working for us and I think we have found a really nice balance. I find myself smiling more and looking forward to loads of things.

I have DE-cluttered and am working in the garden more. Spring is here and daylight savings is coming in a few weeks.

Yesterday I was cruising around in a singlet and undies when, whilst on the phone to the bank Tomi opened the front door with the key and was heading out front. I had to drop the phone and run out the front after him. Wow I'm sure the bloke across the road would have been smiling at that sight! HA HA little cheeky bugger!

We had my foo's birthday last week and had a McDonald's party. It was great fun. We then had a family do and that was great also. Here is some pic's

The following day was giggles with the ladies at the pub. Once again we spent most of the time laughing and talking. It was so nice and easy. Loved talking to the girls who are going through the same stuff with the kids etc. but I love that we can talk mainly about other stuff. Some of them met me at my most unbalanced and have been so great.

We have a race day booked in at the end of September!!!

Kids have school photos today, can't wait to see these. Will wants to go as superman. I actually have never had there photos done so this should be good.

Busy morning to get stuck into

Ciao



Making waves in the pool when I am not anywhere near it!

Well the heading is dramatic and I really have no interest in delving into it but I will say that the positives outweighed the negatives today.

My boys went to sleep in the same bed again this afternoon-cute. They played well for most of the day and I got a big chance to chat to great friends and to get into some household boring stuff. I spent time with my foo's (nephews) and the boys aunt (because she is awesome). Little bit of shopping and a play in the park with coffee. It was so busy though so we came back to my place. Ah it really is the best play land at our place trampoline, cubby, tyre swing, swing, rope ladder, telescope and a sandpit! My boys love it and I cant wait till summer so we can get the slip and slide out too.

On another note Will was sprung by daddy standing at the loo the other day. Mike thought this was fantastic and I saw the mess and was brought immediately back to sharing a toilet with brothers (YUK) It was a milestone and he was so proud of himself. I ran and got the bathroom stool though.He can stand on that and possibly get it in!

We have a new truck as it came with Mikes job and the boys think it is the best thing ever. I did not drive manual cars very well and I can tell you their is no improvement! Bunny hopped about eight times at netball last week and all the cricket guys were watching me I was laughing so hard! I had the damn hand brake on! Whoops.

Did the garage out last week for fathers day. Pretty proud of myself (dad taught me all of it) and it is so handy. Was so great having dad helping me. Love him so much! He was telling me all sorts of tricks and the stories he tells me are priceless. He leaves me tools too, this week I got a tape measure. Next time he's here he will probably say "oh that's where my tape measure is" and he usually takes them again. I wonder if he is aware that he does it? Meh who cares I love that he does it. I had planned on hitting the junk shops with him a few weeks ago but was really sick so I missed it. I'm sure we will go soon enough whilst I'm not working.

Tomorrow is a special day, it makes me want to see my parents even more. It is on my mind big time and I will never forget what was whispered to me xx I wonder what words of wisdom she would have had...

My gosh the smell of spring was in the house today, the Jasmine was divine. I got less than I wanted done but my god i am feeling good. I went running with my neighbour and the sunset was awesome.

Played netball after that and had a great game, worked like a trooper and lost fabulously!

When I came home afterward the boys were "hiding" under the coffee table. Too adorable for words. Daddy had made a home made pizza telling me it was awful so that I would let him eat it all. It was actually awesome. I am yet to pour that vodka but I wanted to write before I did.

A good friend of mine told me that she blogs and I finally read it today. Her reason to blog was to write down all of the family moments so that she would not forget them. I thought that was fantastic and I intend to do the same. Loved reading some of her stories and look forward to new ones.

 My family of four is the most amazing thing and I am so blessed to have them. My husband found out about my blog today. He was telling me the feedback he had gotten. All positive. I am to say the least chuffed that he has the ability to know that I share myself with whoever wants to read it and he seems happy. If it were me I would be reading it like white on rice. Not him. such a water sign.

Last weekend we had fathers day at mum and dads and it was amazing. Dad had the back fort set up and the boys were in the cubby house. I got loads of photos and loved the day. Mum made bread and butter pudding and the banter about that was hilarious. Hubby and aunt were at it and it was causing endless laughs. I had some forgetting that I don't eat bread and oh my god I was ill. Turns out that it really is making a difference to my body because I blew up like anything and suffered through that night. I didn't tell them that though my god I can imaging the comments. It reminded me of how dad and his brother bantered when together xxx dad misses him so much. He talked about it on Sunday and wished his twin could have walked his daughter down the isle and played with his gran kids. Love him so very much. I can not wait to see the photos.

At the end of this day all I can do is hope that I have not done anything that would cause another any upset. My intention is to be the best version of myself, to be the best mother and wife for my family and to be the best friend to you that you need and want.

Ciao